CHAPTER FIFTEEN

One night, when Edna came into the dining-hall, she found that some of the people were talking quite loudly and excitedly. It was Victor, Madame Lebrun's younger son. She joined the people at her usual table and sat down next to her friend Adèle.

She was just about to begin eating when several people at once told her that Robert was leaving for Mexico. She immediately lost her desire to eat and put her spoon down noisily on her plate. Robert had spent all that morning with her and had never once talked about Mexico. He had gone to his mother's in the afternoon, which was quite normal. Although, it was true that Edna had found it a little strange that he did not go to the beach with her before dinner.

She could not believe her ears. She noticed that he was looking at her from across the table at that moment. He was trying to smile at her, but it was obvious that he felt uncomfortable. She turned to her neighbors and asked them when he planned to go.

"He's leaving this evening! Can you believe it?" they answered.

"I don't believe it, actually. No one just decides so suddenly to leave the country as though they were going to take a walk to the beach or get a beer down the street!"

"It's not so sudden! All of you have heard me talking about going there for many years!" Robert shouted.

Madame Lebrun struck her drinking glass with her fork to get everyone's attention. "Please, everyone be quiet for a moment! Listen to Robert's reasons for going so soon. You be quiet, Victor! I often dream that one day you might lose your ability to speak!"

"Yes, I'm sure, mother. It would give you that much more opportunity to talk yourself," Victor replied in an angry voice.

"You, young man, are an ass!" Mr Farival shouted at Victor.

"And you, old man, are not much better, yourself!" returned Victor.

"Shut your mouth, you idiot!" Robert yelled at his brother, "Show some respect!"

The table then became very quiet and Robert began to explain his reasons for leaving. It seemed that he was meeting a friend of the family there. In order to catch the larger boat the following morning, he would have to leave for New Orleans with Beaudelet that evening.

"Yes, but when did you decide to go?" asked Mr Farival.

"I decided today," Robert answered, obviously bothered by the question.

"May I ask when exactly you decided today?" Mr Farival continued to ask.

"I guess it was around four o'clock, sir."

Edna sat quietly, making herself eat the food before her. The lovers were lost in their own unrelated conversation at another end of the table. The woman in black suddenly spoke for the first time.

"I got this necklace in Mexico a long time ago. I pray to it everyday, but I don't know if it's useful outside of Mexico. Could you ask one of the priests there about it?"

Madame Ratignolle then warned Robert not to trust Mexican people. She said that every one of them was bad. She supported this information with a story about a Mexican man she had once known. He used to make and sell very delicious Mexican food near her home. She had always been friendly to him and he was quite nice, as well. Then, one day, she heard that he had been put in jail for killing his wife with a knife.

Edna had no opinions at all about the Mexicans. She could not believe that everyone was going on and on about them. What was wrong with them? Robert is leaving tonight and they're all talking nonsense!

"When do you leave tonight?" she asked Robert.

"Not until ten. We'll need the moonlight to see where we're going," he answered.

"Have you packed your bags and everything?"

"Oh yes, I'm not taking much with me."

After he looked away to answer another person's question, Edna took the opportunity to get up from the table and leave the dining hall. She returned to her home and started cleaning in order to try and not think about Robert. She put away her clothing and changed into a more comfortable evening gown. She did her hair and then helped the nurse to put her sons to bed. As usual, the boys did not want to go to bed. Edna sent the nurse away and then began a story to help her sons fall asleep.

Then a servant of Madame Lebrun came and asked Edna to join the Lebrun family at their home. They were going to have a little going away gathering for Robert. She answered that she might come a little later. She had already gotten ready for bed. After the servant left, she went out on the porch and sat in a chair. She was very anxious, and tried to cool herself off in the night air. Adèle saw her there, looking quite upset. She came over to see what the matter was.

"I guess I was just made nervous by all of the craziness at the dinner table this evening," Edna explained. "I just can't believe that Robert would make such a sudden decision and not have said anything to me today about it!"

"Yes, it was quite rude of him not to tell anyone, especially you. But you should go to the Lebrun's. It doesn't look good you staying away like this. Come. Let's go."

"I'm not in the mood," Edna responded.

"Oh, well neither am I. Come on!"

"I'll stay here. They won't get angry as long as one of us goes."

Madame Ratignolle then headed for the Lebrun's. In truth, she was in the mood to go and hear more about Mexico. It was exciting for her.

Not long after that, Robert came over to the Pontellier's cottage. He had his travel bag with him.

"Are you alright?" he asked Edna.

"I'm fine. Is it already time for you to go?" she answered.

Lighting a cigarette, he told her that he still had twenty minutes before meeting Beaudelet.

"So will you be there for a long time?" asked Edna.

"Possibly for the rest of my life," he answered, "I'll have to see how I like it before I can know for sure."

"Supposing that you don't stay for the rest of your life, when do you think you might come back?"

"Who knows?"

"Well, I don't agree with the way you've handled this. It's ridiculous. Why did you not talk with me about it?"

He did not answer her right away. There were first a few moments of quiet and then he said: "Let's not leave each other feeling angry. I've never seen you like this."

"I have no desire to separate in this way. However, you have not considered me at all in this decision of yours. We have spent a lot of time together this summer and you just decide to remove yourself from my life. Just like that! In one day you're gone! It's not a very nice thing to do to a person. I was looking forward to spending time with you in New Orleans later this year."

"I was too! That may be the reason—well, good bye ... Well, good-bye," he said, interrupting himself. "I hope that you might remember me."

She took hold of his hand and asked that he send her a letter from time to time, telling her how things were going in Mexico. He promised her that he would and then immediately walked away toward the dock where Beaudelet was preparing his boat for the journey.

She tried to control herself, but the tears came anyway. At that moment, she realized the feelings that she had for Robert. It had been a long time since she had felt this way. She did not care about her past or her future. The present was all that mattered to her. She had become aware of her desire and now the object of her desire was gone. She felt terribly empty and alone.

(end of section)